So the phone rings this morning while Mike and I are chattering away. I figure it's my sister, but check the call display anyway. Bell PayPhone. Er... ok. The conversation goes something like this:

Woman: Hi, Linda?
Me: Hi, that's me.
Woman: Hi! I'm *some name I forget*... I was looking at your website.
Me: *Which one? Damn.* Uh-huh.
Woman: I am really interested in Soapmaking and I want you to teach me. You could come to my place or I could come there for lessons.
Me: *The fuck?* I'm sorry but I don't teach anyone how to make soap as it is my business selling it. There are many resources online with very detailed instructions. There's the Soap Dish Forum -- many of the people there helped me learn how to make soap.
Woman: Oh... Ok....
Me: Best of luck, ok? Bye.
Woman: *surprised* Thanks! Bye.

First off, good on her for asking. It takes balls to ask for help and I admire that. I just wish people would think about whom they are asking.

It comes down to sales. If I teach someone how to make soap, especially someone local enough to "come over for lessons", I am creating competition. I'm creating competition that knows how I make my soap and hell, my recipes if I was dumb enough to not use something different from my standard.

Then there's the danger aspect. My lye water mix is stronger than the standard used in Labs. It's very easy to fuck up and have an accident. I know my timing to get under running water in the case of a spill, but add another person into the mix and my safety plan goes to shit. Plus this is my home; it's not a workshop.

I don't want anyone coming into my home as a part of my business. I run SW from here because it's cost-effective and I'm small enough to manage. It makes sense for me as a parent to be available in the way I am when I work from home. But this is my home. I have personal issues with safe spaces and strangers enough to have very few personal friends in my home, much less strangers inviting themselves over for lessons.

Finally, my most personal beef with it all -- I taught myself. I spent a month wandering all over KW looking for handmade soap without finding any. So I decided to make my own. I went online and read for 3 days straight, anything and everything about soapmaking. Then I walked all over on a hot August day to buy all the equipment I needed. That night I made my first batch of soap. It was lye heavy and made with Crisco (I have a contact allergy to Crisco). So I tried again. And again. Until I got it right. Then I kept making soap.

Nobody taught me how to make soap. Nobody. I got advice. I got recipes. I got instructions. But I learned how to do it by doing it. And there's a part of me that thinks if people aren't willing to do the work, make the mistakes, then they can look elsewhere 'cause they're not going to get it from me. That's just the personal part.

I used to be more flexible about this. Then came the bullshit about the label tutorial and the bullshit with a friend using me and my willingness to help and teach. Now it feels like most people are more willing to have things handed to them rather than dig it out for themselves. As someone that finds pride and a sense of self in my ability to independently learn, I'm annoyed when I'm asked to give over my hard won knowledge for anything. Not that people actually offer anything in exchange for the knowledge or my time.

*sighs* Plus it's just rude to ask someone running a business to teach the skill their business is based on if it's not clearly offered. And trust me, there's nothing on SW that says "I offer soapmaking lessons!"

Pfft.