Today has been such an utter comedy of errors. Start with waking up at 4am because my lower back is killing me. I staggered out to the living room to throw myself upon the mercy of my fabulous heating pad. Then by the time my back started feeling better and I felt sleepy once again it was nearly time for Sara to get up. I somehow staggered my way through until I decided to warm up using Mike as a heating pad. I fell asleep.

I vaguely remember waking up at 8:24 and hollering at Sara that she better be ready to go out the door… and then her un-brushed head popped around the door edge and said she wasn’t ready. Yeah, duh. I fell back asleep after that. So very tired this morning. I’m starting to think that maybe if I had dropped Mike off and promptly gone back to bed life would’ve been in a much better state for me on this fine autumn day.

But, but, there’s always a but. I watched an Oprah show last night that talked about heart disease and that whole thing about belly fat being worse for you than ass or thigh fat in terms of heart health. I also have a $57/month membership to my gym that’s been going neglected for quite some time at this point. Add in that I’ve been feeling stressed through the roof lately and that exercise is supposed to be a stress reliever and we have my activity for the morning – going to the gym.

I’m thinking of turning my formidable will upon myself and just making it *very important* that I go to the gym every other day or so. I need to move, my lungs are bad, my back is bad, I’m sleeping better but still not well, and just making sure I take time on a regular basis to move my body should help with all of that. I just have to make it a priority again. If I go in the mornings, that helps. I’m realizing more and more that I’m just done in the evenings. I run out of steam fairly early.

Anyways, back to the drama of my fine day. I leave the gym with a blinding headache (that’s still hanging around like a very unwanted guest) and I reach for my sunglasses to take the edge off of the lovely yet far too bright sunlight. They’re broken. It’s a metal fatigue break, and if I had a soldering iron I’d fix it myself, but I don’t, so they’re going to have to stay broken for a while. At least until I get a chance to take them to lenscrafters. I’m not really annoyed since they’ve lasted 4 years now, and my glasses proper are just fine.

Then my beautiful car… Oh, Mephostophiles. It was fill the tank time again, and we’ve been noticing that the tires look a little under-deflated so I decided to try to fill the tires. 3 broken air pumps later, I’m looking at a front left tire reading 15 PSI, when the recommended is about 34 PSI. There’s no way in hell that I’m going to drive on that, visions of cutting through the tire walls dancing in my head… so I stomp off into the Canadian Tire and buy us a mini-air compressor. I’m highly unimpressed that I had to buy an air compressor to inflate my tires. So stupid. Ahh well, hurrah for more rarely needed toys to live in his trunk.

But now here I am, at school waiting for my lecture to begin. I think I like this taking of some time to type up a journal entry before class. I could be reading for class, but it’s not a big deal to do later or while I’m elsewhere. It’s all the balance act, as usual. Just feels like there aren’t enough hours in the day. Plus I then spend far too much time recovering from things. No matter how well I think I’m doing, when it comes down to it I have complex post traumatic stress disorder and that makes me different. I don’t process stress in a normal fashion and I do need goodly amounts of time to come down off of things.

It’s one thing I’m grateful to Lindsay for. She is very clear in pointing out that YES, writing an Essay is stressful, that YES, dealing with an unholy mess with the administration of a course is stressful, that YES, feeling tired and overwhelmed is utterly normal in this situation. Normal for the young ones, normal for the adult students, and therefore normal for me too.

I just wish my headache would go away. I’ve just finished an extra large coffee and it’s still hanging about so it’s definitely not a lack of caffeine situation. Blah. 2 hours and then I’m home and I can drug myself. *laughs* Ok, time to post this sucker.